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 So it’s Christmas time once again folks,
which means only one thing…over-indulgence! A tonne of present, a
mountain of turkey, and of course an abundance of cracking programmes on
the telly.
But then again, there’s also some pure pap on the box too, which is why
we’ve taken the trouble of sifting through the next couple of weeks of
TV and films to help you decide the best programmes to check out this
Christmas.
Saturday 23rd
So, let’s start our festive viewing on a bit of a dark note shall we?
Part Halloween horror, part Christmas classic, Tim Burton’s freaky
fantasy ‘The Nightmare Before Christmas’ (BBC2, 4.45pm) sees the odd
looking Jack Skellington of Halloweentown accidentally finding his way
into Christmastown, where he plots to kidnap Santa and take Christmas
for himself.
An amazing looking film with a superb score from Danny Elfman, Nightmare
Before Christmas is both haunting and enchanting.
Now if you’re looking for more traditional Christmas capers, then
Channel 5 has a double helping of that classic tale, ‘A Christmas
Carol’, starting with ‘The Muppet Christmas Carol’ (2.15pm), featuring
Kermit The Frog and Co. in a musical fantasy.
Yet if puppets aren’t really your thing, then straight afterwards at
3.50pm, ‘A Christmas Carol: The Musical’, staring Kelsey Grammar
(Frasier) gets its terrestrial TV premiere.
Saturday night is all about the music. If you haven’t quite had enough
of being bombarded with Christmas tunes everywhere you go over the last
few weeks, then the ‘Top of The Pops 2 Christmas Special’ (BBC2, 7.40pm)
has all the old favorites from The Pogues & Kirsty MaColl to Slade plus
newer tunes from the likes of The Darkness and Kylie.
No doubt Sir Cliff will be in there somewhere too.
‘Whatever Happened To Gareth Gates’ (ITV1, 7.30pm) is an insightful
documentary about the little pop-munchkin’s rise and fall from the
public eye. As Gareth prepares to make a comeback, he gets all the
skeletons out of his closet and talks about his fall from grace.
However, if you prefer the dirty world of rock ‘n’ roll to the pure and
innocent land of pop, then ‘God Gave Rock ‘n’ Roll To You’ (C4, 6.30pm)
may be the one for you.
A fascinating, two-hour look at popular music’s flirtation with
religion. From John Lennon’s infamous ‘bigger than Jesus’ line to Led
Zeppelin’s Jimmy Page and his interest in the dark world of Satanism,
this is a great program for anyone with a real interest in music.
Christmas Eve
Sadly, Christmas Eve isn’t all that great for TV programmes, though
that’s mainly because terrestrial telly are packed with films, some of
them actually worth watching.
‘The Santa Clause 2’ (BBC1, 2.10pm), staring Tim Allen is a charming
little film that takes another unique spin on the old fashioned
Christmas film.
‘Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat’ (Five, 3.15pm) staring
Mum’s favourite crooner Donny Osmond might not sound too thrilling, but
it’s actually a delightful little musical that entertains effortlessly.
Things start picking up with animated comedy ‘Chicken Run’ (BBC1,
6.40pm). Co-directed by Walace & Grommit’s Nick Park and staring the
voice of Mel Gibson, this is a sweet and funny family film in which a
group of chickens escape from a farm, aided by a rooster.
For those of you with digital telly, ‘The Story of Fairy Tale of New
York’ (BBC3, 8pm) is well worth checking out.
This hour long programme takes a look at arguably one of the best
Christmas songs ever written, and how The Pogues and Kirsty MaColl came
together to create it.
When 9pm arrives, chances are you’ll be spoilt for choice.
‘Calendar Girls’ (BBC1, 9.30pm) stars Julie Walters and Helen Mirren as
two middle-aged women who pose nude for charity in a charming little
comedy.
If you don’t quite fancy seeing a couple of wrinklies in the nuddy, then
how about the TV premier of ‘Van Helsing’ (ITV1, 9.30pm). Hugh Jackman
stars as an uber-cool vampire hunter sent to stop Count Dracula from
kidnapping Frankenstein’s Monster. A pretty ludicrous plot if you ask
us, but it’s a wicked film.
Don’t fancy either of those? In that case there’s a bumper edition of
‘Nevermind The Buzzcocks’ (BBC2, 9.30pm) featuring Danny from McFly, Dan
Gillespie from The Feeling and others. Simon Amstell presents the usual
pop-comedy frolics, and as always, it promises huge laughs.
And if you’re not tucked up in bed waiting for Father Christmas as this
point, then you have to check out ‘A Fish Called Wanda’ (C4, 11.15pm).
Monty Python alumni John Cleese and Michael Palin reunite alongside
Jamie Lee Curtis and Kevin Kline in this riotous comedy about a group of
double crossing diamond thieves.
Christmas Day
OK, so this is the big one, and it should come as no surprise that the
TV companies have pulled out all the stops today.
Jim Carrey stars as ‘The Grinch’ (ITV1, 1.05pm) in another family
friendly Christmas romp.
Carrey is at his zany best as the recluse cave dweller out to spoil
Christmas.
Meanwhile, legendary music show ‘Top of The Pops’ (BBC1, 2pm) makes a
one-off festive comeback with performances from the likes of Girls Aloud
and Gnarls Barkley.
Later on the same channel, Sulley & Mike set off on an animated
adventure in the wonderful ‘Monsters Inc.’ at 3.55pm. For a full review
of this film, check out the ‘Classic Films’ of our movie reviews page.
Following straight on from this is a one-off special of ‘My Family’
(BBC1, 5.20pm) staring Robert Lindsay as the grouchy dentist Ben, and
Zoe Wanamaker as his control freak wife, Susan.
Always a pleasant show with a decent amount of laughs, this special sees
Ben feigning an illness to avoid joining in with the festive cheer.
Not your thing? Then how about ‘Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s
Stone’ (ITV1, 4.10pm).
The first J.K Rowling novel to be adapted for the big screen sees the
bespeckled young lad join Hogwarts and set off on his magical
adventures. A nice little film perfect for relaxing with after the
over-indulgence of Christmas dinner.
‘Doctor Who’ fans will love the one-off special (BBC1, 7pm) tonight.
Comedienne Catherine Tate co-stars as a bride-to-be who magically
appears in the Tardis and winds up helping the Time Lord on another
adventure.
There’s more Christmas specials later, and they’re both worth checking
out.
Dawn French returns as ‘The Vicar of Dibley’ (BBC1, 9.30pm) in a
two-part special which culminates on New Years Day.
A charming stranger makes his way to the village to meet the backwards
locals, and surprise surprise, Geraldine takes a shine to him.
And finally, round off your dose of Christmas Comedy with ‘Little
Britain Abroad’ (BBC1, 10.30pm). In another two-part show, Lou, Andy and
Co leave their native homeland to jet off over seas. As you’d expect.
It’s incredibly funny.
Boxing Day
It seems that TV is going in peaks and troughs this year. Christmas Day
was a goldmine of great telly, whereas Boxing Day is more like a coal
pit. However, that’s not to say there aren’t a few little nuggets of
brilliance hiding in here somewhere.
Classic sci-fi fantasy ‘E.T: The Extra Terrestrial’ (ITV1, 4.10pm) sees
the cute little alien crash land on earth, where he tries to adapt to
his new surroundings, and of course, ‘phone home’.
After this, there’s a load of guff until ‘Pirates of The Caribbean’
(BBC1, 7.30pm). Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom team up in this exciting
tale of the high seas.
If you’re looking for something a little different, then ‘After Thomas’
(ITV1, 9pm) comes highly recommended.
An autistic boy who escapes from his private nightmare with the help of
a new puppy in this sweet and emotional fact-based drama.
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